I had it all planned out. In my estimation, it was going to be a neat transition from finishing the project I was on that was demanding a lot of my time to bringing in a sibling group of three for adoption. To have things orderly and under control sets my mind at ease. However, the week and a half before my project was complete and right in the busiest time, I'm on the phone with the foster parent who had two of the children and would no longer would be keeping them. The caseworker asked us if we would take the children that day. I went to work in the morning and came home later that afternoon to a garage filled with supplies, clothes and to the new addition to the family. Not much has been tidy ever since.
Control, expectations and the right to live my Saturdays the way I want to – everything was altered through the adoption of our children. There’ve been times of frustration and challenge, some of which I anticipated and much of which I didn’t.
I’m speaking to guys here: Are you feeling a bit stressed out because your wife is hoping you will agree to consider fostering or adoption? Are you wondering if your world is going to get turned upside down?
Let me be really honest with you. The stress you feel right now is just the beginning. If you say yes to fostering or adoption your stress will be on the increase, not on the decrease. We’ve adopted four children. I can assure you that my stress level has increased by doing so.
But so has my joy! We got our littlest one when she was 2 years old. I just dropped her off this morning at school, now age 5 and in kindergarten. “I love you daddy,” she said as she bounded off for the schoolroom door.
Each of our children has contributed to our lives. Each has contributed a measure of pain, joy and love. Before I became a dad of adopted children I wondered if I could love them the way a dad supposed to love his kids. The answer is yes.
Men, I invite you consider doing something that will rip you out of your comfort zone and call you up to greater level of service in your own home. I think of God’s grace in my life expressed through giving Jesus to die on the cross for my sins and rise from the dead on the third day. I’ve been a pretty big sinner in my life but God’s grace and service toward me has always been bigger than my sin. Based on God’s love for me I gladly moved toward the marginalized children in this world and seek to change their destinies one life at a time. Will you join me?
James serves as the senior pastor of First Southern Baptist Church in Guthrie. He loves serving Jesus by serving God's people. He also enjoys spending time with his wife of more than 20 years as well as his four children. Learn more about him here.
